Insomnia

"I Thought You'd Jump"

I thought you'd jump the edge with me,
We were so high, we both were free
But I found myself alone,
Flying from that earthly zone.

Ethereal ways I thought we'd wander
Through the stars and across the water
Hand in hand to a magic place,
Of love and peace, so interlaced

But when feeling for your fingers
The wind caught mine, a chilling linger
Why didn't you tell me your fear to stand,
Least of all to leap from land?

Dark and dreary though it be
Your mind found comfort more than me
"Let us fly away," I said
But you would rather stay there, bled.

I cannot change the wind for you
I cannot stay within this slough
Waiting for your leap of love
To join me in the clouds above.

The choice you make so absolute,
No clouds above will you salute. 
So when I fly, I fly alone,
And you remain an earthly drone.

Starring at the sky and sea,
Wishing to one day be with me
A wish is all you keep with you,
While I have stars and sun for view.


"My Frozen Heart"

It's red right now, I feel the blood
It bleeds, it hurts, it is in love
I cannot live my live like this,
This bleeding heart I must dismiss.

I can no longer feel your warmth
Or hear your laughter full of mirth
It hurts too much to think it through
When all I want - to be with you

The cold sets in, the pumping stops
My blood is still, my temperature drops
The fear is forgotten now in time,
My thoughts are steady now in line

I can no longer drift with you,
Gone so far, so long from view
My thoughts are stilled, lost in time
My heart is frozen, stopped mid-chime

So in the freezer my heart must go,
I'll save it for another blow.
Who knew you'd make me freeze my heart
By forcing us to be apart?

The cold is good, I like it better
Then the painful, drifty weather
Of my warm and bloody heart
That always hurt most in the dark.

I thought you'd catch me if I fell
I thought I knew you just that well
But now I'm left to think it through,
Every last moment I spent with you.

It eats me up, it tears me raw
I don't want it to ever thaw.
This heart so dangerous to me,
Whispered things I thought we'd be.

But now it's frozen good and well,
Stock-piled where leftovers dwell.
I will not bring it out it seems
Until you fade from all my dreams.

And then again I'll risk that shelf,
And find that part within myself
Where frozen hearts can thaw in peace,
And then I'll throw it in the streets.