Thoughts of a Strange Grandpa

It's funny when people die.  You always get told the old stand by "I don't know what to say, but I'm sorry." Even I don't exactly know what to say, I guess I'm sorry it happened too. I feel almost as speechless as everyone else.  I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be crying to myself or just remembering the good times. It always seems worse when young people die because they missed out on so many great experiences - having a family, backpacking through Europe, driving cars, dyeing their hair, eating sushi, seeing the next Harry Potter movie - things like that.  But when you are really really old, is it more of a relief to die?  I know my grandpa was somewhere in his 80's and he had done a lot of things in his life, lots of things I'm sure I have no idea about.  I really didn't know very much about him, which I think is sad, but also some what expected. He didn't live around here and most of my memories stem from when he and grandma would snowbird to Nevada because Washington got too cold.

It's not that I don't have a lot of memories of him, I do, but they are all very similar to each other.  We really didn't hang out and chat about each others lives. I remember grandpa was very consistent at waking up at five every morning and having his cup of coffee, and I always wondered how he pulled it off, because I knew coffee was bad, but grandpa wasn't. I never really thought of him as unpleasant, but he definitely had a gruff way about him.  He did laugh a lot, but I guess it was more like a cackle followed by coughing.  He had his funny moments too, though most of the jokes he told I never thought were funny, I'm sure I was too young to understand them, but he always seemed to be commenting about something and then cackling over it. I kinda thought of grandpa as my older brother Ryan, except a lot more sane and not such a bully.  They looked strangely alike.  It's funny that I knew him all my life but he had already lived sixty + years when we met.

I have one particular memory of him that still makes me smile, it was distinctly different.  Grandpa had taken my younger cousin and me to Smith's one morning, I think with my dad, and dad had gone inside to pick something up.  Laura (my cousin) and I were sitting in the car and rather unexpectedly Grandpa started humming...do dee dum de do...well not exactly humming, but almost singing some really old really slow song to himself. Laura and I looked at each other trying to surpress laughter. Somehow music of any kind and Grandpa didn't seem to go together.  The idea was almost unfathomable and comedic.  Grandpa was kinda old and irritable, where did he ever get a chance to listen to music least of all repeat it? Funny how we view our grandparents.  That was my ten-year-old reaction at least.  It didn't make sense that grandpa could have ever been anything or anyone than who he was now.

My grandparents always had a bit of a love hate relationship (to put it mildly). I thought hanging out with them was somewhat risky because sooner or later grandpa would yell at one of us for something "Don't drop that there! Pick that up!  What do you think you're doing!" or grandma would randomly start crying over who knows what (usually after reading some Louis L'Amour novel).  Spending time with them had it perks though. They both seemed to like having us around.  Grandma would cook something, usually cinnamon rolls or clover buns and distribute them in all their freshly-baked glory and Grandpa just seemed to wander around looking for something useful to do and yelling at my dad about getting things done lol.  But they were family.  It never occurred to me that they were strange or out of place because they were family and that's all that really mattered.

50 Things To Do While I'm Alive

You know, we all hear of someone doing something amazing and we say "Wow, that's so awesome, I wish I could do that!" Well, I'm sick of wishing.  I want to actually do those things I've always wished I could do. But first, I must know what they are, thus the list below. I'm not planning on dying and I don't have terminal cancer, but I think sometimes it's nice to have a direction in your life, so here are my

"50 Things To Do While I'm Alive"

#1. Publish a Novel -  Luckily, I already have one written, so that's not actually as crazy as it sounds.

#2. Learn French - Also luckily, at most colleges you can take French, so that's also not as crazy as it sounds.
#3. Live in France - Yes, this is about as crazy as it sounds :P
#4. Visit Europe - I know that France is in fact, in Europe, but I want to go other places (like England, and Germany and Italy)

#5. Go to a Pub - Don't ask me why, it must be my O'Keefe genes, but a pub sounds awesome.  Even if it's the same thing as a bar, just with Irish accents.  Irish accents make everything cooler (even digging up potatoes)

#6. See Stonehenge - Yes, since I'll be in Europe anyway, Stonehenge is a must.  I would have said "Dance around Stonehenge in the light of the full moon" but I actually think that's illegal.

#7. Visit Egypt - This is necessary because I want to translate some hieroglyphs while I'm there.

#8. Sleep in a Lighthouse - Ever since I was a wee lass this has been a dream of mine.  Preferably one on Prince Edward Island.

#9. Ride a bike on Prince Edward Island - this is of course necessary because I will be able to see much more of the shore while on a bike.
#10. Wade in the Atlantic Ocean - because I've only ever waded in the Pacific.
#11. Own all the books by Lucy Maud Montgomery (even the two I didn't like)- this has been an  ongoing endeavor to have all things Maud, and I'm very nearly done. I believe I'm only about 5-6 books shy. The woman was a genius, and deserves an entire shelf to herself. (he he, that rhymed!)

#12. Be Recognized As An Author by a Stranger - now, this isn't exactly in my hands, but it would be super cool.  Plus every would-be author dreams for that day when someone hears their name, turns to them and says "oh my gosh, your book __________ changed my life!  How did you ever think of that amazing scene where the baby ___________ and the old woman __________? That was incredible!" And you smile and realize all those late nights, crying over agents and publishing and editing and story plots and heroes and heroines was strangely worth it.
#13. Paint Something that Takes My Breath Away - because I am my own worst critic (except for my parents lol)

#14. Change a Tire On My Car By Myself - yes, I've never had to do this, so I thought in case I did, I ought to put in some practice when there's not a lot of pressure.

#15. Climb a Mountain - Preferably one with trees and water, and possibly elves and talking animals, but I won't be too demanding.

#16. Have a daughter named Nimue - yes, this is one of my life goals.  If I'm near death and have no more children, I'll see if Jules can just change her name for me. Maybe I should do it before she turns 18 so we won't fight about it. :P

#17. Own a Farm - not a stinky one, just a dog, five hens and a rooster, a horse and maybe a cow.  That's all, and kept a bit away from my house so I don't smell it all the time.  One with lots of room. It'd be fun to have a pony too, but I don't have to have one.

#18. Find the Perfect Necklace - You may be surprised, but this one has been impossible.  I keep finding necklaces that are nice and pretty and beautiful, but they aren't PERFECT.  They don't look at me and say "I'M YOURS, I WAS MADE FOR YOU!" which is what I'm waiting for.  This actually might be one of the most impossible of my goals. It have to have Braveheart and Egypt and books and writing and metal all meshed into one, yes impossible.

#19. Sing with a Band Once - come one, we have all wanted to jump up there and sing something. Anything, just to do it with the band.

#20. Try escargo - yes, I want snails damn it.

#21. Drink a Cappuccino Outside At A Cafe In France - just like in the movie "Sabrina" preferably while hearing a french song in the distance.

#22. Start A Group Of Cartwheelers On the Road - Yes, I have always dreamed of being on the road with a group of people who want to do a bunch of Cartwheels.  No explanation as to why.

#23. Tell A Boss Off At Work - Then probably quit.  I think secretly we all have wanted to do this.

#24. See O'Keefe Castle - Maybe I will be special lucky and it will be a pub. :P

#25. Look in the Mirror and Feel Perfect - This may sound weird to anyone who isn't a woman :P
#26. Go Hunting At Least Once Successfully - Call it the Katniss in me.
#27. Learn a Martial Art - This is the Ziyi Zhang in me. (Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon reference)
#28. Sculpt Something Usable - pot, pan, ceramic container, anything that looks cool.
#29. Play Greensleeves on the Piano - The only reason I ever wanted to play the piano was for this song.

#30. Sing in Front of An Audience - I don't mean with a band.  This is just me singing, for real.

#31. Plan My Funeral - Morbid, but fun.  Morbidly fun.

#32. Read all the Charles Dickens books - I love the ones I have read, they were awesome.

#33. Read the Scriptures From All Major Religions - I think that truth can be found from anywhere.

#34. Visit a Temple from All Major Religions- Yes, I think this would be awesome.  Temples are the best kept buildings of any religion and I think they show a lot about the people who use them.

#35. Go On A Cruise - I've heard these are really cool and fairly inexpensive. Maybe to the Carribean. or Alaska.

#36. Visit Every Continent - Even Antartica - Penguins rock.

#37. Learn Latin - something I've always wanted to do, though it is much harder than it sounds.

#38. Go blonde - I don't mean mentally.  I just want to know what I would look like blonde.  It doesn't even have to be extreme. (yes, that's me, I am tall and beautiful)

#39. Design My Own Tattoo - You know how everyone is like "Man, if I got a tattoo, this is what it would look like" I totally want to be like "yes, this is my awesome Braveheart-ankh-Lucy-Maud-tattoo".
#40. Finish writing my trilogy -1 1/2 done, 1 1/2 to go...
#41. Get my Bachelor's degree - almost done with my Associates (as long as I don't fail Stats! lol)
#42. Make a quilt - like a really big one.
#43. Run a Marathon - like on Biggest Loser

#44. Go Waterskiing  - yes, I've never done this, but it looks cool.
#45. Go Snow Boarding - this also looks cool.
#46. Go to a Broadway Show in New York or London - This of course means I must get to New York or London.
#47. Learn some archery - Again, blame Katniss.

#48. Basket Weave Underwater - j/k, never really cared to do that. Actually this one is Make A Fully French Dinner - and feed it to the people I love ("but mom, I don't want to eat the froggy legs....")this would have to be after living in France.

#49. Visit Every State in the US - I think being a citizen, I really ought to do this.

#50 And finally, Write a Biography - Cause seriously, after all this other crap, don't you think I should at least record it somewhere? :P

PS. Please forgive my if you are OCD and noticed that some words I capitalized and others I didn't.  Yes, I just didn't care after a certain point.
PS2. Also, please don't think of me as shallow and narcissistic, I mean, I know I am, but just because my goals in life seem a little on the wading-end, know that there are deep things I want to accomplish but they aren't exactly things you can do as much as things that happen to you over life (aka become perfect and awesome all at once).  I'm not going to create a wish list for those things, I have to allow them to happen as they happen. :P  And if you have no idea what I'm talking about good for you, contentment is your lot in life.